Hey ho…Jerry here again…

jerry

Yo! Let’s give a big shout-out to ol’ Nelson!!! Thanks to his out and about roaming this week from bar to bar, I’m back in his saddle again tonight! I love’m, God bless’m. Right-O! Ha-ha!

Well, ok, we gotta give the guy credit, he has been trying to get back in the saddle, and word is he is very remorseful with letting me carry the reins again. But you know, I think it’s been good for him, to have this break from that sobriety insanity! Bloke’s been having a good ‘ol time the last week being happily back with his friends there at the pub! Lot’s of laughs and comradarie — ain’t no where else to find those sort of fun going’s on! None on this planet earth at least!

So, while he might have let me have my way here, I have to say that he’s put a damper on it with his bloody lingering regret! He seems to think that he can find something BETTER!? Well, I KNOW he never will find anything better than being pissed up at the pub and having a good time with the boy’s! I know it, and I’m sure many who might read this rot will know it too!!!

So…(that’s HIM interjecting…ack). So…so, well, ok, he might have a point….hahahaha — that he’ll never find better than the pub comradarie and good times!!!!

So…(he’s got to make his mind up here)….so…..well I say, “So WHAT!”. But he doesn’t seem to see it that way. Ack, weeeeel, that’s his perogative. As for ME, I’ve been having a GREAT time — we’ll let Nelson deal with the hangover’s!!!

So…(there he is again)….well….alright then! ENOUGH ALREADY! Nelson here now, for the moment anyway. Tomorrow is another day. My–his–choice, whatever. I don’t really know, but that’s ok. I DO remember how great sobriety felt, but I think I need to find new friends. At 60 years of age, that’s not a simple thing to do — but thanks to my therapist, she thinks that I can. So…I’m working on that. In the meantime, I don’t know who’s going the be the ringmaster here….oh well…*sigh*…

NELSON.

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Jerry here!

chainandball

Hello, this is Jerry. Craig…I mean “Nelson” isn’t here right now. He had a bit of a fall a few days ago — ha ha! You might call it more properly, a “fall from grace”! Well, grace in his books anyway. Ya, so he quit taking his killer drug so that I could take a breather and enjoy life for a change here again. Let me tell you, Nelson is SO boring since he quit drinking. I know he agrees. He hates going to the bar to see his friends, sitting there like an idiot with his Zero-alcohol beers. Did you know that the bar he goes to charges TWICE the dollar amount for a bottle of non-alcoholic beer than they do regular beer!? How crazy is that!!!???

Anyway, Nelson can’t afford the $8 non-alcohol beer, so I gave him a break with that. We’re back to the good-ol’ $3.50 REAL beers again! So he’s saving a lot of money now, thanks to me!

Let me tell you, while Nelson was really enjoying the sober, alcohol-free life, with all the benefits, like, sleeping well, being free of anxiety and all that, what he didn’t like was the ISOLATION of it all! Ha! Where else can we find the comradarie and fun times than at the bar drinking real beer!? NO WHERE ELSE can you find that sort of time — OK!? So, I gave my brother a break from the boredom. You can’t criticize me for that!!! He really needed a break.

So, OK, while he needed the break, I gotta say I’m a bit worried about him. He has gone way over-board with the whole thing, getting pissed to the gills every night since last Thursday. That’s 5 nights in a row now, including tonight. The guy just doesn’t know how to moderate! And it isn’t my fault, ya hear!? You can’t blame me. HE handed me the reins last week when he stopped taking his magic no-drink pill!!! HE did that, not me!

Let’s cut Nelson a bit of slack here tho…cause that damn medication (the Antabuse) was making him feel like a Sloth on a Sunday! He was dragging his sorry ass, suffering fatigue in a big time kind of way. I felt sorry for him, poor guy. So, give ME a break now, cause I freed him from that so he could feel even more normal than the Campral gave him (I love that shit).

So, come one, give us both a break. Turns out the whole sobriety thing isn’t peaches and cream folks. No, it’s damn hard to deal with after we’ve been drinking all these 40 years. Damn hard, so please don’t judge Nelson, folks. I have to admit, he has been doing his damnedest to stay sober and get his sorry-ass life in order. I’ve been a wee escape for him lately. While he might not admit that I’m the best thing for him, I know I’ve been a bit of big-brother sort of help for him just now, poor guy.

So, ya, give both Nelson and me a break! This is the real world! Don’t we know it.

Jerry

Twinkle twinkle…

tinstar

I’ve been watching a new TV show called, “Tin Star”, starring Tim Roth, in a role that will probably define/epitomize his whole acting career to date. Pure genius. The show is about a cop living in Canada who moved from the UK with his family to escape his alcoholic past. But, he soon discovers that geographic relocation doesn’t change anything in the end, because the problem moves with him.

I like this show because it shows alcohol addiction in the rough, as it really IS! First of its kind for me to see on TV. I think it’s great.

Once a drunk, always a drunk. No fault of our own, it’s our disposition, the way that we are — who we are. I’ve been to hundreds of A.A. meetings. Enough to realize that every drunk is only one drink away, no matter how many years of sobriety under our belt, from falling right back into the thick of it.

And so? So, that is simply the fact of the matter. All we can really hope for is enough grit and grace to help us stay sober for that one day, that one week, that one month, that one year, that whole decade. By the grace of God, or not. What if our addiction is more normal than not!? What if, it can actually shed light on an otherwise dark issue? What if.

Nelson

An Addict Fell in a Hole

Thanks to Abbie for this great one!

abbie in wondrland

pexels-photo-1601495_1553889831615AN ADDICT FELL IN A HOLE and couldn’t get out. A businessman went by and the addict called out for help. The businessman threw him some money and told him to buy himself a ladder. But the addict could not buy a ladder in this hole he was in. A doctor walked by. The addict said, “Help! I can’t get out!” The doctor gave him some drugs and said, “Take this. It will relieve the pain.” The addict said thanks, but when the pills ran out, he was still in the hole. A well-known psychiatrist rode by and heard the addict’s cries for help. He stopped and asked, ” How did you get there? Were you born there? Did your parents put you there? Tell me about yourself, it will alleviate your sense of loneliness.” So the addict talked with him for an hour, then the psychiatrist had to leave…

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Candy land…

A close up landscape of colorful candy of many varieties.

What if the world was made of candy and we could eat it all day?

What if each country specialized in making their own special candy and we shared it with each other in joy, peace and love?

What if there were no poor, no sick, no lost, no frightened, no anxious, no heartbroken, no lonely?

What if we all lived our lives to the absolute fullest with each of us doing exactly what we love, living how we want — to each according to their own, in a paradise — not lost, but found?

Such a world would be a grand place, wouldn’t it? In a romantic sort of way I mean. I mean, wouldn’t that be wonderful? We wouldn’t need to drink then, would we? I mean, we wouldn’t need to drink then, would we? I think many drink — get lost in the drink — when their hope in life, in living, in sailing with swans, in swimming with dolphins, in flying with eagles — in — in — in — just…doesn’t…happen.

Of course I’m being simplistic, perhaps a bit childish. As for me, I lost my child — that kid — too many years ago. My hopes, my dreams, all my great — amazing — ideas –| The things that used to make my heart beat faster, further, to reach towards eternity — they all left me…

The bottle became my love — a warm, tender hand to calm my loss. I so adored it, until it left me too.

Sobriety comes with it’s own itinerary (tea, at three, shall we?). And while it doesn’t touch us with the same gentle caress that the booze did (until its caress turns into a strangle, that is), it does allow us to see life as it is — which makes us crave the drink again! I know, I know. Well, it does, in a way — but we’ve traveled a long, dusty, winding road to our sober destination, haven’t we!? And the view is marvelous.

It’s not a cotton candy world, but there is lots of ice cream (without the Bailey’s)!

Sober well-wishes to all.

Nelson