On the 8th day after Christmas my sobriety gave to me…just when I thought that after a month of being sober I’d already had it all. But no, today — all of a sudden, as I was taking the trash out — usually the most boring thing I can ever do — I was looking around at the per usual un-lovely alley way behind my building and realized that my vision seemed somehow….more…vibrant . The asphalt looked more asphatly; the concrete building in front of me looked more concretey. I looked up to the sky and the sky — oh the blue! So blue! And THEN I smelled it — not the sky or garbage — but the air. The early morning air smelled so fresh, almost sweet!
And then this afternoon, I ate a few candy coated peanuts. Simple candy coated peanuts! And oh, the taste! Just like the day long ago that I first tasted fresh honey. Around 11 years of age, I was at the home of my elementary school crush. Her father was a bee keeper and he offered me a taste of his latest batch of honey. Not knowing what to expect, I gingerly dipped my finger into the liquid gold and then into my mouth. My taste buds exploded into rapturous delight. Such a sweet joy I have never forgotten. Tasting those candied peanuts today was just like that! Well, almost, but they sure didn’t taste like that yesterday!
And then tonight, watching TV — it seemed like I had a new TV! Oh ya! The colours were so vivid, so bright, so rich, so alive! I had to pause and revel in it, amazed by its stark refreshing beauty, like a bright red rose bathed in the dew of a warm summers morning.
Yes, on this 8th day after Christmas my sobriety gave back to me — my senses; my vision invigorated, my sense of smell renewed, my sense of taste rejuvenated! What a gift! I didn’t know, scarcely even realized, that the alcohol had robbed me of those things long ago — so insidious the beast it is!
Like a barbarous thief in the night, it sneaks in and steals our senses and our life and our being and – and our very heart and soul…
Not any more.