Well…

plane

Well, I would like to be able to report that by now I’ve weaned myself off and am alcohol free, but I’m not. My plans all went to hell on Wednesday when in my infinite alcoholic wisdom I decided I could go to the pub to work on a couple of reports. It was early, so I doubted I would see any of my buddy’s. WRONG. One was already there. Had been since noon. He was just about to leave when I walked in, so like a good bar buddy he decided to have one more to keep me company. By the time he left, another buddy had come in. I went home — 4 hours later — all pissed up.

Thursday I was hungover, of course, and so when another buddy texted me around 1 pm, I didn’t hesitate joining him at the other pub we frequent. I got home about 8 pm. Went straight to bed. Yesterday, I started at noon. Got home around 7. I drank less yesterday, so today I feel ok. Back to square one.

I seem to be able to limit how much I drink as long as I stay home. If I go to the pub, forget it. I’m tempted to be discouraged, but I won’t. I’m going to taper down over the next few days again and give another go for zero by Tuesday or Wednesday, and no pubs. I’m going to start going back to the A.A. meetings when I’m feeling the itch to get out and socialize. I just have to do this!

Nelson

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8 thoughts on “Well…

  1. Nelson, I know I kept waiting for quitting to get easier, but here’s the deal, it is never going to get easier for you to quit than it is right now. I kept waiting for the right time, but the time is never going to be better than it is right now. You have to make the decision that you are not drinking no matter what. Quit worrying about the what if’s, if you’re not drinking no matter what, the what if’s don’t matter. Where you go or who calls you to go to the pub doesn’t matter either, because you’re not going to drink, no matter what.
    When you finally make that decision, the struggle is over.

    Liked by 2 people

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