I just came across a quote that my Jungian therapist gave to me some time ago, written by Annie Lamott, about Forgiveness, for mourning the loss of my past, as I have been so wont to do.
“Giving up all of having had a better past.”
I have spent— no let’s call it what is exactly — wasted — too many years trying to just cope with life, and have most of that time liberally doused it with the most unholiest of water, alcohol. I am easily tempted to beat myself up for this. Tempted to angrily punish myself for what an idiot I was — am. But, in reality I know that’s being too hard on myself. Most of us tend to focus on our most prominent misgivings when we look back like that. From what I understand this is actually quite natural.
So Ms. Lamott is urging us, when we do look back, even if the view is negative, to nevertheless forgive ourselves for being human and to give up and let go of our angst-filled notion of wishing we had had a better past.
Indeed, what’s past is past. Yes, it lies belly up, putrefying, rotting, in the basement of our memories. But we don’t need to go down there to purposely smell it. The past is over. Our only hope is to let go and hope for a better day, today and tomorrow. Easy to say…
May we all have better days.