Alright, so much for my last “Day 1” here. I’ve given up on that round. In the past 61 days (May & June) I’ve had 9 day’s of sobriety. Ok, it broke all previous records in the last 15 years, so if we want to see things from an optimistic, pie in the sky, rose coloured glasses perspective, then I’ve made progress. Doesn’t really feel like it though. In between those 9 sober days I drank my face off. In A.A. they call being out drinking, “doing research”. Well, I’ve done so much cramming for finals lately and over the years, I should be getting a frigging PhD by now! Not one I’d hang on the wall! I’m not proud of myself. I suck at sobriety. I’ve flunked right out of sobriety school, big time.
Ok, so I flunked out the last couple of months. If I beat myself up over it too much I’ll want to have a drink. We all know where that leads us. Right to the bloody grave. So, I’m re-enrolling today. Starting another semester so to speak. Over the next couple of days I’m going to alcohol detox myself again–just a few ounces of wine as needed but only when I’m feeling overwhelmed or too weird. This works for me because I typically drink only in the evenings (albeit it a lot). I’ve never been a 24/7 drinker (Here is a good article about this method). And yes, I’m going to take in some A.A. meetings. Being alone in the evenings isn’t fun.
So here goes nothing. Back to square 1.1…I’ll let you know how it goes.
Ya’ll take care.