Morning after paranoia…

Well, despite the gallons of beer that I drank last night, I somehow escaped having the classical “Oh my God I’m going to die” hangover. Mostly. I didn’t escape the morning after PARANOIA. You know, “The world is going to end today…no, this morning!!”, type. The, “Oh my God I’m going to get fired today!”…the, “Oh my God, I’m sure I’ve got cirrhosis or cancer!”, the “Oh my God I’m going to die a miserable lonely death down on skid row as a drunk!”, the, “Oh my God who did I drunk text last night?” type.

I find a hot shower helps a lot. I’ll talk to myself. “Don’t worry buddy, this is just the morning after paranoia again…by noon you’ll be feeling much better, just fine…relaaaaax.” That works pretty well.

Reflecting on last nights drunk entry as to why we keep doing this to ourselves, I came across an interesting article this morning about Emotional Intelligence and Alcohol. I’ve heard about this before. AA’er’s talk about it. It suggests that when we use alcohol to cope with life, especially from a young age, we never really grow up emotionally. The booze stunts our emotional intelligence/development. We are still teenagers in adult bodies. This makes a lot of sense. It could certainly help to explain why we compulsively keep drinking. Compulsive behaviour is immature behaviour (unless it’s OCD). We just don’t have the emotional maturity to make the right choices or do the right things, so we continue to use alcohol to cope. I don’t buy this theory 100%, but I think there is some truth to it.

At my age (mid-fifties) that theory feels like a death sentence. I don’t have many years left to grow up! But, I am reminded of a few people who I have known over the years who quit drinking and did catch up their growing up remarkably fast. So I guess there is still hope. That is, IF I STOP DRINKING…!

Oh dear Lord, hasten the day, hasten the day!!!



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