My toaster taught me something today. I have owned this toaster for about 7 years. Until a week ago, I could never figure out which button on it added or subtracted extra time on it, to cook the toast longer or less. THIS WEEK, however, I finally figured it out. Yes, this week, during my week long sobriety. I now know which button to push if I want to cook my toast longer or shorter!
Tonight I thought to myself…”Hmmmm…isn’t 7 years a LONG time to finally be able to figure out which button to push, out of two choices all this time….? ” Well, ya….DUH…it IS a long time to finally figure that out! So, tonight, I’m wondering why it’s taken so long… I KNOW why! The alcohol, of course. The damn booze has dumbed me down for so many years that I couldn’t even figure out how to work my bloody toaster!!! My toaster!!! 7 years!!! Is that not pathetic? Yes, it is. It’s also amazing how the drug, alcohol, works. How it has kept working all these years, behind the scenes, so to speak, keeping me stupid. Amazing. I know I’m not alone. This is scary shit.